Gabrielle: Well, I'm glad I could help. Education's very important.
Julie: When was the last time you had sex?
[Susan stops what she is doing]
Julie: Are you mad that I asked?
Susan: No, I'm just trying to remember.
George Williams: Well... I'll see you, Dr. Van De Kamp.
Rex: Please, you're dating my wife. Call me Rex.
Carlos: We're not very nice people, are we?
Gabrielle: No. We're not.
Carlos: Aw, when we got married I thought we were gonna be so happy.
Gabrielle: Me too.
[pause]
Gabrielle: Look on the bright side - at least we're still rich.
Carlos: Thank God for that.
Sister Mary Bernard: Money can't buy happiness.
Gabrielle: Sure it can! That's just a lie we tell poor people to keep them from rioting.
Mary Alice: Trust is a fragile thing. Once earned, it affords us tremendous freedom. But once trust is lost, it can be impossible to recover. Of course the truth is, we never know who we can trust. Those we're closest to can betray us, and total strangers can come to our rescue. In the end, most people decide to trust only themselves. It really is the simplest way to keep from getting burned.
Bree: Maybe they'll just be happy for you.
Gabrielle: Bree, my friends are models, they're not happy for anyone.
Lynette Scavo: My favorite game is counting all the things I'm dying to say to you, but I don't! Like...”pipe down, you annoying nutjob!". I could NEVER say that.
Andrew Van De Kamp: Isn't that weird? That's the sound my mom makes when she climaxes!
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